I knew I was in for something unforgettable when I entered the theater on April 19th to enjoy a stage production of Hotbed Hotel*. The ambient music that was playing in the background for the relaxation of the paying customers was Jimmy Buffett so I was quick to determine that Richard was not running the sound for this show. I was shown to my seat; front row with an unobstructed view comp'd by my good friend and co-star of the show, Uncle Keith. Keith knew I was going to be writing a review of this show and understood that he had to play ball in order to get a good review - my first note of the evening in my playbill was: "good seat". The evening was certainly off to a good start.
I will not go into detail regarding the plot of the story rather I will provide my observations on each character and discuss their individual performances.
First there was Hopkins, the drunken handyman of the hotel - the role of Hopkins was played by JB who as I found out later is a retired OB/GYN. JB delivered a great performance - nailing his lines with the right amount of emphasis where it needed to be - he reminded me of my grandfather, not only in physical appearance but with all the drinking he did. He did however miss his mark near the end of the show and took a header up the staircase. I could tell by the reaction of the others on stage at the time that this was not a scripted tumble - but they all improv'd well, JB appeared to not be injured and the show kept it pace.
The owners of the hotel, Terri and Brian Cody; played by LO and DG had magnificent stage chemistry. While the playbill announced that this was DG's first appearance on stage with this performing group you would have never known it - this play is best described as the Marx Brothers meet the writers of Frazier. It's fast paced, with a lot of entrances and exits from all sides of the stage and there's a lot of mad-capped animated action and DG delivers flawlessly. Through the show he is the victim of one accident after another and his character changes accordingly the more and more he gets frazzled and injured. LO is the calm voice of reason over the hotel and directs her husbands actions with even temper yet stern authority.
Major Ponsenby was played by DL who in my opinion had a challenging role to play. After exiting the stage as the British speaking Major, he was forced to make quick costume changes and return as the Major's Arab speaking long lost brother. he delivered his characters in good order and never missed a beat with the dialects - at no time did I hear a British sounding Sheik on stage.
Now we're getting to the good parts (and I do mean "parts")....
Maureen, a half witted full buxom hotel maid was played by AL. The scatterbrained nature of Maureen's character resulted in AL bounding across the stage almost every time we saw her - She was a pleasure to watch and her acting wasn't too bad either. During one scene, she appeared on stage in a blouse and her panties - I found the note in my playbill that indicated "good seat" and placed a check mark by the comment.
Hayley Harrington, the character that was described as being a "robo-slut" was performed by the talented, voluptuous, and drop-dead gorgeous SC**. A real-life mother of 3 teenagers, SC did absolutely nothing to persuade the audience that she was anything but pure raw unadulterated sex. When she appeared on stage in a black leather teddy and red stiletto heels, another check mark appeared in my playbill. I added a "plus" behind this one.
Ashley was played by KR, While not oozing with the raw sexuality of SC or possessing grand Tetons like AL, KR delivered her character as a cross between a Rodeo Drive gold digger and the girl next door - Ashley was introduced to the audience as Mrs. Sam Lewis (you'll meet Sam in a minute) but by the end of the show was hooking up with the good Major. During one of the final bedroom scenes, KR was clad in a skin tight (for the lack of a better term) body suit that had holes in all the right places to showcase her curves. I was close enough to see the goosebumps. Check mark number 3.
Dorothy Lewis, another character claiming to be the wife of Sam Lewis was played by a man. DB gave a great performance, even when he was stripped down to his bra, girdle, and stockings the audience was hard pressed to determine that the she was in fact a he. The playbill received no check marks this time.
Last but not least there was Mr. Sam Lewis, played by my friend Uncle Keith - in all the years I have known Keith I have never wished to be him - this night was an exception - he was constantly surrounded by beautiful women on stage - he touched them, he kissed them, and as I found out later he even got goosed by one of them when they were under the covers together. When Keith readied himself for the bedroom scene, preparing to jump into bed with his beautiful wife (the girl, not the dude), I wished I was him up there with his alabaster skin awash under the bright stage lights, clad only in his boxers and his white "wife beater" undershirt.
I was truly amazed and proud of Keith for being able to control his urges while on stage - only later did he tell me that they had sewn the front of his boxers up so there was no chance the audience would see his doodle during the performance. With one exception, Keith delivered a flawless performance; his one gaff was when SC appeared on stage in her teddy and heels chasing the Sheik around with a whip and he was expected to deliver the line "drunken preacher and mad major". What came out was "drunken preacher and .....( a long pause, and then)....British dude". I don't blame him for screwing up his line after the on stage whipping scene - I think if I was asked to speak after that I could not have uttered a word. I also couldn't stand up for a while and was really glad the theater was dark.
All in all it was a good performance. I was left with a few questions:
1. Was Sam Lewis a bigamist or was Ashley just some high class escort?
2. Did Ashley and the Major live happily ever after?
3. Did Maureen and the Sheik hook up?
4. Did Uncle Keith nail any of his co-stars?
5. Can SC be persuaded to chase me around with a whip next time I visit?
My final grade - four snaps in a circle***!
* - A comedy by Michael Parker, all rights reserved.
** - There is truly no adjective that I can use that gives this woman justice. Never have I seen a woman that took my breath away like SC did - and I've been with a lot of women, I've slept with like 3 or 4 of them. When I met her at the bar after the show I couldn't stop looking at her so Keith let me know if I need to apologize or if I now have another restraining order out on me.
*** - A tribute to "In Living Color". If you don't know what that was, get the hell off my blog! You're too young to be here!
